Hey!
Welcome to my blog. I’ve never done this before, so it’s going to be a learning experience.
Why now?
A little bit on why I’m starting this blog now, at this stage in my life.
I’m 34 and a first time parent to a 19 month old ball of energy. They are the light of my life, but have really consumed my life for the past 2 years. I really need to find myself again. The plan is for this to help me do that.
I work part time, take care of the little one the rest, and try to be a good partner, but I’ve been falling down on that. The little one has taken all of my attention.
Depression and Anxiety
I should also note that I live with depression and anxiety. And I say live, as I’ve had both since my teenage years. It comes and goes. Sometimes it can be really bad, and at others, it’s not really noticeable. But I am always aware it is there.
This tends to mean I do a few things, and sometimes I’m not conscious of it.
- I hyper-fixate. This means I tend to focus on one thing to the exclusion of all others.
- I catastrophise – this means that I will focus on the worst possible outcomes of anything – I’m getting better at this, as in I’m aware of it happening most of the time now.
- I ruminate – a lot. This means that I focus on things that have happened, and it tends to be the bad bits. I understand that I do this, but it’s hard to stop sometimes.
What Happened?
As mentioned above, I tend to hyper-fixate on things. And, I hyper-fixated on my child, to adverse effects on my relationship, and on me personally.
I should have realised it would happen. It’s how my brain works and processes.
What I’m Doing to Fix Things?
I’m fixing things in a few different ways:
Getting bub to sleep in their cot at night, or at least starting the night in their cot. This should allow me to get some time with my partner in the evenings.
Went to my GP for a review. We did some blood tests (had to have some extras done to check a few things) to check everything is where it should be.
Booked an appointment with my psychologist – I haven’t seen them since I went back to work at least – so over a year – good to have at least a check in
Started this blog – I need an outlet for thoughts, and I’m very bad at verbalising my thoughts – but apparently writing them down is fine.
Tell me about you?
So that’s it about me for now. No idea what I am going to write about next. But tell me about you? How did you find my site? Anything that you would like to hear about?
Until next time!
EJC